so i've been living at home for the past couple months - something i never would have guessed i'd be doing. but here i am, 30 yr old sachi, once again living in my pink bedroom (but without the hot air balloon wallpaper!!), the only difference is that this time around i've got crosby and cavin (plus all my kalat).

it's really nice that my parents are so giving and letting us stay here for a year or so while we save up money to buy a house, and especially magnanimous of them to allow us to live rent-free. and while this is really great, i've come to realize that there is an underlying reason why i never moved back home since college.

whenever i have a conversation with my parents, i can't seem to communicate as clearly, or i can't really understand what they are saying. it's really frustrating to me and i think it's one reason why living at a distance is preferable. i already have a hard time getting my point across, so add trying to talk to my parents, and i'm completely stressed out.

case in point. we got my dad a computer for christmas. he's super excited, and i'm glad to be able to afford this present for him, especially since he's totally into "new gadgets". but i honestly don't have the patience to try to teach him how to use it, especially when we can't communicate what problems arise.

at work yesterday, i missed his phone call. when i called him back, he told me that the computer wasn't working but now everything is fine. but when i asked him what exactly happened, all he kept saying was, "well, when i clicked, nothing happened." and while i'm not a whiz with computers, i do know that i would need a better, more explicit description of what the problem was in order to fix it. when i got off the phone with him, i realized that i was talking much louder than i had started and that people around me probably picked up on my rising stress level.

so when i got home, i see my dad and he's telling me that the calendar and other stuff that used to be on his desktop is now missing. ok. easy enough. i can help fix that. and i did. and everything was fine.

but as cavin and i were leaving to go to the movies (to see juno), my dad is telling us that the dvd burner isn't working and that he can't burn stuff anymore. i left it up to cavin while i went upstairs to get ready. when we got back 2 hours later, he's still on the computer, and next to him is a new stack of coasters, the result of those that didn't burn correctly. i'm trying to ask him what exactly what happened, except he's backtracking with his words and just when i think i pin down what is going on, he's telling me that's not what's going on and something else happened. cavin is trying to calm me down because at this point i'm just yelling, but it's no good. so i just retire upstairs, hoping that cavin can fix whatever the problem is.

and it's not just with my dad i'm having communication problems. early on when we first moved back, we went to dinner with my immediate family. we drove an hour + away to go to this smorgasbord that my parents had gone to several times in the past. i seemed to have remembered going there also when i was younger, and when i brought this up to my mom, she's telling me that it can't be. but i'm pretty sure that i remember being there and definitely remember that on the way back home, i was driving with art and pv in the car and a bee flew in while art was driving. he started flipping out and we almost crashed. so anyway, my mom is insisting that i've never been there before. i'm telling her that i DO remember being there and that i'm not making it up. well, it won't drop because she can't be wrong, and i can't be wrong, and then it turns into this chaotic conversation ending with me talking very loudly in a room filled with people, asking my mom how she knows my memories and how can she know what i remember?

i don't know how my brother does it - he's never moved out except for college. i'm glad to be around my family, in fact, i like it very much and it's a welcome change from my jersey and dc days when i would only be able to visit for a weekend. i guess i just need to figure out how to deal with them without freaking out and getting an ulcer from stress.

Labels: chaos, random